12 beers a day

God I love America. The land of the free. The land of opportunity. The land of dumb-ass people who sue for spilling hot coffee on themselves at Mickey D’s. Just call it “The land of trying to get anything I can for free, no matter how much it cost me to go to court and sue your rich ass”.

We have another culprit in the get rich scheme. This time, it’s a former lawyer who has a gambling problem. The bitches name is Arelia Taveras and she used to be a successful lawyer before she became accustomed to blowing all her money on blackjack and craps. So what does she decide to do? Sue the casinos for not stopping her.

SUE THE CASINOS FOR NOT STOPPING HER GAMBLING! Maybe it’s just me, but isn’t that what casinos are there for? Gambling? I thought that. That’s why my broke ass knows I shouldn’t go. Then again if she wins this case, I’ll be the happiest man alive because I’ve lost millions on Internet gambling. (Exaggeration? Maybe?)

This lady is suing for $20 Million!!! She claims to have lost close to a million dollars. That’s like a 5000% return. My math may be a little off.

Her claim: “I realized it was an addiction when I was losing all that money and breaking out in sweat,” Taveras said. “It went from every month, to every week, to every day.”

No shit. After you lost about 5 paychecks you didn’t stop and think, “Hmmm. I may have a problem?” I lose $100 bucks and I am pooping my pants. A couple grand and I’m jumping off a building.

She really has no excuses. She was in a casino. You know what they have posted at almost every corner in a casino? Do you? This:

STOP F*CKING GAMBLING, YOUR ADDICTED.

Yeah, that’s there. If not, it should be. I may notice in between my free drinks and the hookers hittin’ on me. If not, oh well, it’s only a problem when your losing.

If this chick gets $20 mill then I am suing everyone I have ever lost money to. That $5 bet back in middle school, you should have stopped me Johnny, now your going to pay me a grand. That $50 bet on the Super Bowl, damn patriots, you owe me 100 g’s sports gambling site that I hate now.

I feel like I just won the lottery. Well, only if she wins.