12 beers a day

Heather in the sky, with a penthouse. Just pretend your singing “Lucy in the sky with diamonds” while saying that, makes alot more sense that way.

Heather Mills just got PAID. Yes, this news came out yesterday, but I have been to busy promoting my contest to give a damn. (BY THE WAY CLICK HERE FOR THE CONTEST INFO)

D-I-V-O-R-C-E. This is just like winning the lottery for some people, anyone remember Anna Nicole? Bingo. Well you can add Heather Mills to that list now. Some chick I never heard of before this divorce, is now $48.6 million dollars richer. Wow. The best part: SHE ASKED FOR $250 million! All she had to do for that money was say I do, give a little peck in public, and then go home and saddle up on the wrinkly beatle. Not fair. I would have have done him twice for that amount of money, and I’m not even swinging from that side of the plate.

I must now add to my goals in life.

Goals:

1. Start a kick ass blog - check

2. Get laid by Halle Berry and that chick from Transformers, at the same time.

3. Marry a really old rich lady, don’t sign a pre-nup. Take half her money.

I really need to get started on those last two. I’ve been a bit of a slacker.