12 beers a day

Coming this weekend. Starring Chandler from 12beersaday.com…

I am bored at work and playing around on photoshop. I would suggest you save this picture as the background on your computer. Then after you do, you will probably get laid ten times more then you already do, which is most likely none if your reading this blog. Why? Because I am definitely the most popular guy on the planet at the moment. Besides, what other bloggers do you know who put their faces out there like that? Huh? None. I am a man child beast who will eat your young and kick large goats in the balls.

Super couple Jay-z and Beyonce are officially hitched! Well officially according to the Internet.

 The marriage of singer Beyonce Knowles and hip-hop star Jay-Z is finally official, with a New York town clerk confirming the couple have filed a wedding license.

Hell yes! I been waiting for this day ever since her thunder thighness and big lip mcgee started dating. I don’t understand why celebrities always end up dating and marrying other celebrities. It’s really not fair if you think about it. They already have all the money, careers, prostitution rings… They should share they wealth. I think America should pass a law making every female celebrity be forced to have wildly passionate monkey sex with me and then give me a million dollars of their money to thank me for the 3 minutes of heaven. The male celebrities can watch and pay me 2 million dollars for learning my tricks for pleasing a temptress.

If all else fails they will at least pay me something because they will feel sorry for me, so really it’s a win-win for me.

So I pretty much cannot wait for this movie to come out this summer. In fact, I love the idea of this movie so much, that I have already been banned for posting leaked images, and had a dark knight trailer removed from my site. This pretty much makes me a bad ass. So in honor of my boner for batman, here is a compilation of pictures I can find from the upcoming blockbuster.

Thanks to filmofilia, IMP awards, iwatchstuff, Movie House, and The Dark Knight movie blogspot blog who is  more obsessed then I am, for the pics.

Anyone have a wetnap?

This is just a continuation from this story I posted earlier about underage starlets I would dry hump furiously.

It seems as though Miley Cyrus and her 15 year old body like to show off. Pictures of Cyrus showing her bra and panties have been floating around the internet for the last day or two. Miley has been in the news before showing her body off with leaked pictures from her camera phone that showed her taking sexy angle shots, usually only the fat chicks get love for the angle shots, but Miley was reaching out to her fans I think.

You can see the pictures here thanks to wwtdd.com.

And here are some of the other so called sexy pics of Miley from earlier in the year. You be the judge on whether it’s her or not. I’ll let my hand be the judge. Oh monkey.

Jamie Lynn Spears and Britney Spears are two very popular people. I realize that. What I did not realize was the reactions I would get when I wrote this post about Jamie Lynn being pregnant close to 2 months ago. It has been my most viewed page and my most commented post.

I would like to take time out of my busy schedule and let you, the readers, take a look and see what all you guys and gals are saying about Miss Slave for You and her baby sister. It’s good quality family reading material.

**This contains language you would not use in front of your mom.

1.  
   1. laura Says:
      March 7th, 2008 at 10:37 am ejajaja buenisimo!! son unos grosos!!
      Cariños, Laura.
   2. ROBYN Says:
      March 9th, 2008 at 12:25 am eHI I Am 10 i love what you are doing on tv i love the program on nick it is lol didu no chase loves you yh toldy
   3. AJ Says:
      March 9th, 2008 at 10:24 am eshame on you jamie lynn.to think u actually used to be my role model. i was so obsessed with her.now even remembering that disgusts me.
   4. Julia Says:
      March 10th, 2008 at 3:52 pm eYou know, I am so sick and tired of this razzing Britney bullshit. You wanna know whats REALLY worse? Dumb Skanks that have nothing better to do then razz and write blogs about singers, newflash whos the REAL loser here? So what if she’s young and pregnant? And WHO cares if her sister is loaded. She wants to go to school, let her. It’s really her decision.
      So while you sit there, writing these pathetic and useless blogs to make yourself feel great, no one likes a bitcher, and a complainer, especially about singers and movie stars. Get a grip, And give your head a shake. Get a real job.
   5. admin Says:
      March 10th, 2008 at 4:24 pm eSorry Julia. If I had britneys money, I’m sure I would still write about her and call her a skank. She pretty much enforces the notion almost every other day.Don’t hate, appreciate.
   6. kaytee Says:
      March 26th, 2008 at 10:33 am ewow u really need a life. I agree with julia. With her GED, im sure shes gotten farther in life then you have writting these pathetic things. Let her live her life.
   7. admin Says:
      March 26th, 2008 at 1:59 pm eOf course she has gotten farther you dumb ass, her sister is….BRITNEY FUCKIN SPEARS. Again, if I had her money, I would be famous and banging every girl in sight. BUT USING A CONDOM. Not knocking anyone up. And screw getting my GED, I would actually finish high school. I’m sure being 2 months prego made it so tough to goto class. Right.
   8. Effie Says:
      March 29th, 2008 at 4:12 am eLMAO
      you’re all pathetic tbh.
   9. Ella Smith Says:
      March 29th, 2008 at 7:54 am eJamie Lynn is actually trying here! Her fiance is working extra hours to help raise the baby! If this is the way she wants to live her life- let her! People really need to stop writing such immature comments!
   10. mia Says:
       March 29th, 2008 at 11:21 pm ethink it rocks
   11. wowimsexy Says:
       March 30th, 2008 at 8:30 am ehahahaa. wow. this is like the fith website like this. why is everyone so obssed with jamie. get a life. like really? her bf is kinda f-ing hott though. i’d bang him =P
   12. joshua Says:
       March 30th, 2008 at 7:09 pm ei love you jamie britney
   13. IsabellaLynn Says:
       April 21st, 2008 at 4:33 pm eWow, to whoever wrote this.
       I wan’t to shoot you in the fucking face.
       Stop, accusing Britney, and stop talking shit.
       JamieLynn, didn’t do anything to you so shut your fucking mouth.
       You really have no life to be writing shit.
       You’re probably some fucking low life, thats fat as hell, and ugly.
       There for you have no reason to talk.

So basically, I’m pathetic, fat as hell, and ugly, Jamie Lynns beau is f’n hott, I’m obsessed with Jamie Lynn, (ed. note - this was my first and ONLY post about her and her bulging belly by the way), she has gotten farther in life then me, (No shit), and blah blah blah. The last comment really made me want to just post. I know some of you check this on a daily basis but never comment or read the comments, but these were to classic to pass up.

On a lighter note, I once strangled a girl just with my giant balls. Suck one.

The title should make sense by the end of this post. Weekends are great. This weekend was probably the best weekend in April ever for me, and I am old, so therefore lots of Aprils have come and gone throughout my life.

Weekend Recap for me

I had way more then 12 beers this weekend.

Parties in fields, in the state of GA, in the middle of nowhere, with truck beds full of ice and beer, should be required every month in the USA.

Digital cameras and bar room floors don’t mix very well.

Air conditioners can be knocked off their cement blocks by stumbling and bumbling drunk people.

Drinking till 3 am and then getting up to start drinking again at 10 am could possibly classify you as an alcoholic, unless your me, then your just a damn machine.

Having loads of beer poured all over you is quite refreshing, and makes a good aphrodisiac.

Steroids and drinking lead to confrontations.

Fair skinned people should always wear sunblock. Regardless.

Laughing is probably the greatest invention ever.

Here is the video to go along with the title of this post. I laughed, hope you do to.

Talking Goat

Gazing at cheerleaders bottom fancy. Hey, if I was married to an anorexic I would be staring at every girl with a little meat on her. I would also yell, “Hey, I’m famous, you want to do me with a strap on?”. Why? Because I can.

I hope this doesn’t get me banned again. I saw it on film drunk first if my host wants to ban me. Not gonna happen though.

By the way I don’t condone making videos of people and their deaths, but I will post videos others did doing that exact thing.

Joesportsfan.com brings us a really disgusting video which I don’t think I would ever attempt even after 543 beers. Seriously. How much money was on the line for this guy to do this at a baseball game BATHROOM!

We should all donate a little bit of our hard earned money to the “McLovin Fund”.

The great, the amazing, the exciting…paperclip artist? Yeah, this guy makes art with paperclips. My favorite is the Trojan Horse.

I own the world record for this video game, except I own it using real pee and real toilets. Screw virtual reality. Back out the way when I’m taking a pee break.

Check out the top ten shirts to get arrested in. I think number 6 is my favorite, and she is also looking at the pictures above her, below her, beside her, behind me, and in front of me. It’s like superman with 360 degree vision. Freaky indeed.

So there you have some reading material for the day. Sorry no news about Britney Spears popping out another kid, or Jessica Alba licking my boobs and tickling my taint, this is all I got. Now go spank a monkey and chug ya freak.

It’s the “chocolate rain” guy rick rolling your ass